Sunday, January 25, 2015


As I look at her, her eyes and tone are meant what she said.

Past few weeks ago, we talk about like a lot. Things are more simple then I ever imagine about. When she talks, I knew every words she said is truth, at least that moment she can't lies about feelings. I tried to stand by her side of view, tried not to be judgemental or a jerk. I stare at her as she talking all about the mess she been through, it was... well I just can't say a thing, not a single, because I'm not her, all those decision she make had already made, so what I do is keep my opinion inside for myself and give her a smile. And my ears are all hers. 

I doing good recently, build up my body so that can carry a person while climbing a mountain. But those fat are not going to lose me if I not control eat and burn it. About she, I hope she also well prepare, if not I going to carry her up to the mountain and non-negotiable for her. I'm carrying her up! 

All those story she told, some I can respond, some I wanted to, but instead of telling her, I rather keep it to myself, because I know she won't listen. Stubborn head! 
What I can do is a simple smile, for her. The last thing before I left, or we end our little meet up, I really need her to remember my smile. Just my smile. 

As I told her those birthday card I made and those hundred stars I fold for her. She said I never gift her before. Neither last year or previous years. Last hangout I told her I did, but she never received my gift before. Her voice are so sure about that. So, she ask when? I just smile away. 

Yeah. I did once for her. And she broke my heart. 

For the card and stars I made
Please hide away from her, so that she'll never find out.

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Paper Girl

I wonder.
I wonder how it will going be.
I wonder what your mind thinking?

You just like Margo Roth Spiegelman.
When I think about you, I always think the back of your head.
I picture cracking your lovely skull, unspooling your brain, trying to get answers.

You may say all those movie I watched or the book I read,
I might in too deep about the character and make compare with you.
Truth is, there are some element inside of you that I can make imagine. 
If not, why all those movie entitle "This is based a true story" then will be a good movie? 
I think because all those real life experience, so I will make compare and imagine always.

So, Margo is a special one, until now who I can think of in my real life Margo, is you.
Why you? 
1. She always think sometimes people are fake, she said those are paper people.
2. She is a good planner and a dare devil.
3. She want to disappear and not to be found, start real fresh. 

You could say:"That not even like me."
But this is how I imagine what you like.
I can imagine what you look like, but never quite perfectly.
Because people are people, you can't force them to do or look what you want them look like.

Monday, January 05, 2015