思念是一种病

对你的思念转化成记忆体
每一次的梦
梦境遇见你
听见你说话的声音
真的很想你
尝试撬开话题
你却冷漠已读

太久没有浇水的花
会枯萎
或许还残留着爱你的痕迹
痕迹终究会磨平
这样的爱意终究会磨灭

时空
把这分爱扭曲
选择
总会有瑕疵
坚守
已不在乎能否在一起
而
心碎
只是一阵子的事情

Quotes of mine

I believe what I believe is a bullshit

I smile and laugh at those stupid humanity

Maybe I'm intelligent, but far more than while handle my emotional

People are leaving, don't they? So pull your shit together and move on

I see though people evilness, that is sort kind of my talent gift

I always sort out my time plan for important people, so if you wanna last minute pull out, just let me know earlier

God help those who help themselves
People don't see far, yet I see too far and afraid of proceed

I know that is a trap, and only make me go into that trap is somebody I care most

If I were you, I kill myself already

Maybe it's cruel or I don't know what happening, but one thing I'm sure is I can see through problem

I don't think clear when I have attachment, but I think and act straight when I have alcohol

People think they afraid of changing, truth is they need some push

You'll know I'm a lunatic, once you're my friend

I think too much, like very much that you can't imagine

I'm a weirdo, I mean I talk or text weird, but if you feel not weird maybe we're same level of weird

If girl I like can eat a lot, then I can pay

Tough is not the way, to believe it's okay not to be okay, that's what I believe

Sometimes I act angry in conversation, but secretly I'm not angry at all

Music playlist, that what I hide myself into it

I knows things before you told me, sound one of the talent I have, I guess

As long as can make her high, that is not about the dick size anymore

A girl that have unique character, don't apologize, that's what make you became you

No matter how ridiculous she is, please believe her, because she just a girl.

With you, I really need to learn how to shut my mouth

In my term of healing, psychologist never help

One thing I never regret: I kissed your cheek on 14th of June, Kiss Day

- - JinQuan

To Mrs J

This time was different

Different than before

Yea

The feelings was hard and painful 

But it all came by

Around 

Bend 

After all these days I smile at those memory

Those memory I think will hurt me 

I told myself 

Those memory

Those moment 

I was smile and glad 

Maybe some flaws in those memory but

joy memory more then flaws 

and that was okay for me

Don't cry on those happy memory you have with people

Those are beautiful memory 

Don't let sadness take away from it

It take away enough from you 

Don't tears 

If you're thinking a happy, warm, joy memory 

These memory are deserves more than tears 

You should smile on it

You know 

Sometimes 

I think I was stupid to write those letter for you

Telling my feelings and truth for you is right

But

It is unnecessary

It is unnecessary

Well, I guess love can cloud your judgement was right after all 

I mean I was a stupid after all 

Don't I?

I mean why should I worry about losing you when you tell me I don't need to. 

I don't want to have you 

Why should I?

When I know I'm the only person that know you well

When I know I can have a female friends willing travel with me

When I know I can be your best friend ever in your life

When I know I can seduce you in some ways 

When I know I can give you some different taste in life

When I know I can learn about girls from you

When I know I can learn about how to take care a girl 

When I know I can share your burden

When I know I can shout on you, you can shout on me

When I know we can share about photography 

When I know someone that have the same taste with me

When I know you are weirdo as me 

After all of this

Then 

Why should I having you when I know can let you tears a lot?

I know if I can't let you stop, that is my problem 

But I did always did let you stop, don't I? 

And that enough reason for me to stay by your side. 

Just fuck others telling me that leave you is for my own good. 

Okay? 

Little of recently

It feels better recently
I mean, after all it will be alright
Yea
Should be

Yea
I'm JinQuan after all
If world going to doom I think I will be one of the survivor
JinQuan always good
JinQuan always not afraid pain
Something like that bla bla bla
Talking about like JinQuan won't destructible

Yea
Again
Maybe this is my fantasy again
Who's care how I going on

Well, only real true friends know what I'm thinking
How I am
And I going well again

ALL IS WELL

Belle of Ball

I tired about clarify you and I

I tired to search about meaning of us

I tired to pretend I'm okay

Lucky

All of my friends still love me

Make me feels I'm important to them

They appreciate what I did for them

At least of all

They gave me know what a friend will did for each others

At least 

I feel special when I around them

From you 

We are not friends

We are not lovers

We are not soul mates

Tell me one think that you did it for me

Just one single thing for me

That make me feels special for you

Please, my ears are yours

Remind me what you did for me 

Truth is 

I just a guy

Who always try to make use of you 

to fill up my fantasy

So, I don't blame you never discover my ability 

Maybe 

Just not you

And my heart shatter once again

Scale

How deep will you hurt me?
Scale 1 to 10

How bad can you treat me?
Scale 1 to 10

How easy can you ignore me?
Scale 1 to 10

How easy can you forget me?
Scale 1 to 10

How cold shoulder can you treat me?
Scale 1 to 10

And last

How deep is your love for me?

Continues below after scale..










































































































If you did scale the last question
Means
I am nothing to you
And
You want to live in the world that you always wanted to be
To fulfill your own desire
Handsome boy with charming eyes
Additional with some good family background
And
Plus with a good heart and fine brain
Okay
And
You can easily forget the person who always be with you
Fight with your life
He gave you his heart before the other guy does
No
I'm not the guy I talking about
I talking THE GUY
Who always waiting you
Patience
Tolerance
All he wanted is a chance
A fair chance

But now, all seem worthless to do
The guy you with now
or maybe not with now
or any guy you with now
He is a lucky guy

Sometimes
I think about how to save a broken soul
I try to save those
But not mine

Maybe is the reason that
I always in the save zone
Not the action zone

最長情的告白

錦權
你就別
再去
寫一大堆
說一大堆
關於你的感受了

你寫了
心情會好些
可是會加重讀者的心緒
你的心酸
你的感覺
你的血
你的淚
就好好的留給自己吧

你要知道
你其中一個讀者
她總會忘記
你們有過的小細節
你們有過的回憶
她總會把你和她回憶
記成是她和別人有過的回憶
你要原諒她
因為
你總是不找她說話
而她
也不太想和你說話

不要因為她總是把你鎖在門外
然後你就不去敲她的門
因為
你永遠不知道
門背後的她
在哭
在自責

別人能開啟她那扇門
那是有一定的原因
可能是她任性的原因
不能怪
人美
就是任性

別問我的心痛
別問我的心酸
別問我為什麼

我們選擇接受我們認為好的愛情

最長情的告白
不是
那些美麗的承諾
而是一句
結婚找不到人
我做你新郎
--JinQuan

Blue Girl

It was so wrong
So wrong that day
I should give you this little poor thing a hug
I saw your crying out loud tears
I heard your shattering voice

All I wanted to do is make you feel better
Not happy
Is feel better
But you and him in middle of something
So
I back off

I have no fucking IDEA what to do
I have no fucking IDEA what to say
So
I just do what I can do in the moment
To make you feel better

By the way, food was delicious

第八號當舖

我想寫些什麼的

但卻又制止了

只希望我幫的上忙就好

我總是希望妳能簡單些

簡單些

別每天沉靜在那些累人的感情枷鎖

你盡可能阻止了

發生了

你唯一能做的就是順着你的感覺

但順着的同時

也是過的很糟糕

若有第八號當舖

我想

你應該會當掉愛情

換

什麼都好

再輕一些些

她說她也只是分享心情而已
別把她分享的事情看得太重

大家都在說經驗之道
但
有些事
有些問題
不到那個年齡
你不可能體會到那種感覺
經歷了後
才知道
原來
一切真的不遲

“你可能會得不到我，但你不可能會失去我。”

有些愛
即說不出
也表達不出
只能用行動
而且要很努力的
去維持
而不是去證明

致：友情與愛情

若在你不理，不回，不見面，冷淡我，傷害我，無視我的情況下

我不能好好的愛自己，好好的生活下去

那麼真的有那麼一天

當我們的感情昇華的時候

我們並不會是開心的一對

致

友情與愛情

我們都害怕失去自己以為很愛的人

但原來她並不是那麼的愛你

然後

我們會做出一些傷害，為難對方的事情

告訴對方自己有多麼的愛她

其實說白了

她可能不會愛你

致

友情與愛情

當你愛的人不是你想像中的愛你

她拒絕了你一次又一次

在你朋友眼裡的她

她像是一個玩弄感情的人

但你有沒有想過

其實是你把她放在那個位置上

致

友情與愛情

第一次可以把自己的心情寫照寫的那麼好

感謝最近努力閱讀與心靈癒合

謝謝我自己還是那麼的愛妳和自己

不知道你現在過的怎樣

反正

你知道我三更半夜也會接電話
若不想我打去嚇你

你就不妨打來吧！